Waiting, watching through the window,
Looking out to a new day,
For a moment you forget,
The new reality on display.
For a split second
You let yourself smile,
before remembering that;
It’s hard to be happy at this time.
Because outside the window
The earth continues on,
It’s rituals and routines,
From dusk until dawn.
But inside it is different,
Keeping an epidemic at bay.
You hold your hand on your heart,
And bow your head down to pray.
Life for you now is different,
The grief so fresh and new,
More complicated too,
You don’t know what to do.
The usual routine,
For when a loved one has died,
Is removed- deleted
No one can be by your side.
Not able to shed the tears,
Share stories and prayers,
Talk about old times,
Things that happened through the years.
This part is so special,
To share and spread your grief,
But today you have to hold it in,
It’s yours alone to keep.
Noone can shake your hand,
Or share their sadness for you,
Noone can even visit, chat,
Have a cup of tea or two.
For in this present time,
You have to grieve alone,
It makes the process long and hard,
Although you are very strong.
At night you say your own prayers,
have the conversations in your head,
Remember they can hear your prayers,
They listened to every word you’ve said.
Although it may not be public,
Shared or even celebrated,
Your loved ones surrounded you
The entire time you waited.
Anger, sadness and frustration
Will fill in the gaps,
Where the love you had lived,
As you smell his tattered cap.
Although you have great sadness
And your emotions may seem schizophrenic,
This is pretty normal I am sure,
During a pandemic.
………….
Complete novice at poetry. Sometimes I have rhyme and sometimes I don’t. I just write it as it flows.
This is beautifully poignant.